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Seems weird to write.

This used to be such a natural expression.

Now it's forced out of me. My hands don't seem to work right.

I'm afraid of what I'll say.  It's been a long time since I've thought that.

Who cares?  Who is looking at your quivering hands?

Who is listening to your quiet gasping breath?

Who is watching to see whether or not you make it home in one piece?

Screw them.  Stay focused, Tim.

I take a sip of whiskey and I reach out for... for what?

What am I reaching for?  God?  Humanity?  Failure?  Success?

Instead it's a black nothingness.  I can't seem to make it or lose it.  I feel proud and embarrassed.  Jubilant and depressed.  Like I'm just holding the phone for someone who is more important.

Wish they would get back so I can release my grip on this useless receiver.

Today's Blasphemy: Gender Roles

I watched the newish Russel Crowe movie, "Noah" with my Theologian wife, Julie, recently, and was struck by a few things.

1. Whoever animated the Ents in Lord of the Rings was obviously commissioned to do the "Watchers" in Noah.  Stupid concept of walking rocks (Grignak from Galaxy Quest, anyone?), but nicely animated.

2. Sexism is insane.  It's just nuts to me. Degrading half of our species just because they have a vagina instead of a penis is evolutionarily ass-backwards.  We're stunting our own growth here.  (In the movie, Noah will preserve the baby if it's Male since it can't reproduce but will kill it if it's Female because it can continue the lineage of sinful mankind- LITERALLY stunting their own growth, but I found it poetic for how in today's society, men are higher regarded)

3. The Bible is sexist.  I've tried to think about it in so many contextually significant ways to make it not appear so, but it is.  The Bible was written throughout multiple generations of Patriarchal society.  There's not a single female author.  And Christians think that since the Bible is infallible and the Bible contains- let's just soften it by saying "gender privileging"- they must also carry on that perspective- hiding behind phrases like "head of the household" or "the leader in the relationship" instead of saying it outright: "This is a sexist family."

Let me be clear:  I DO read the Holy Scriptures, and I DO believe they are inspired by God.  AND I think they are BLATANTLY sexist.

There is no way forward for our society-- no way out of this disgusting pit of sexism-- until we recognize that our scriptures are sexist and we have to be the change.

Here are 3 simple ways to do so:

1. Stop using "God" in the masculine form.  "Our Heavenly Father" or "He will ______" or "He is ______"or  "He always ______" or "He never _____"-- it's ALL BAD.  Ditch it.  "But-but-but-but-"  SHUT UP. It doesn't even matter what your rationale is. Stop being sexist.  Jesus had a penis, so call him a 'he.'  God DOES NOT have a penis, so only attributing him to the masculine pronoun does a HUGE disservice to God and to women.  Call God "God" or "Godself" or "YAHWEH" or "Allah" or "All-being" or "Pat" for all I care.  Just stop giving God a penis.

2. Read the scriptures with a BIG FAT GRAIN OF NON-SEXIST SALT.  When you come across passages that stereotype gender roles ("Song of Solomon" "Psalms" "Proverbs" "anything written by Paul") keep in mind that these are probably the most sexist writers in the whole freakin' Bible (how many wives did Solomon have?) and that, yes, Jesus loves them, but they are DEAD WRONG in their stance on women.

3. Search your own life for ways that you use gender stereotypes and sexism on a daily basis.  I guarantee you that whether you are a man or a woman or somewhere in between, you have been exposed to sexism and have adopted at least a little of its dastardly ideology.  It can be humbling but facing it head on is the only way forward.  Have these thoughts ever formed in your head or slipped out of your mouth (EVEN JOKINGLY): "Women should be in the kitchen."  "Women are bad drivers." "Men are more aggressive." "Women are emotional." "Women don't work as hard."  "Men are better leaders."  These are all lies, spurred on by the people who think they are "just honest observations of our culture."

I think I've ranted enough.

Go women.

Go humans.

The creation debate: Dinosaurs

A blogger I follow just randomly did an article on dinsoaur and human coexistence.  Apparently there have been some human tracks that have been found inside dinosaur-ish tracks dating back to a long time ago.  The problem with these alleged discoveries is that they are made by people very excited to prove something ("See, I TOLD you guys!"), instead of a more scientific approach ("Oh, look what we discovered").

When Bible people try to put on a "Science Cap" it just doesn't work.  You aren't impartial.  You are putting your whole worldview on the line and attempting to reinterpret history to justify yourself.

They might be right, however.  It just seems a ludicrous way to come up with an answer.

For instance.

I tell you the sky is blue.  You agree.

Then I tell you how I figured out the sky is blue.  You see, blue is the color of cold and way up in the sky it is much colder than down on the earth so the sky is blue.  I know because in my religion we read a lot about hot and cold things.  You no longer take me seriously and look for the nearest opportunity to exit the coffee shop.

I guess what I'm saying is: Christians make terrible scientists.